In my mind, a perfect relationship would be me and the perfect guy driving down any given road, smoking, chatting, and listening to Manu Chao? Not all the time, but at least once. Really just enjoying music, the road, good weed and each other.
I’m a weirdo.
im always getting Friend-Zoned. It doesn’t only happen to guys, man.
(Source: brain-food, via lostinthe50s)
“she” being my cousin. We were talking last night about her never-ending quest to find me a boyfriend. I always ignore her, because the people she knows are stupid ad scandalous. But when she asked me about the guy who I had been crushing on for about a year now, I stopped and realized that I really don’t like him very much anymore. I know, if you have read my deep longing “I’m so pathetic I basically love this guy who has no idea” posts- I’m sorry. I’m stupid.
Anyway I realized my feelings for him have changed. He is still my good friend who I will chill with whenever it happens, but I think something just clicked in my head. I realized I was being dumb and falling and waiting for this guy who doesn’t really give a shit about much of anything. Especially me. I think I realized that I will probably be much happier on my own than I could be with him, so my head just threw that “lovey dovey” feeling right out the window.
When I told my cousin, she kinda got mad. She said I was letting my feelings go too easily and normally it takes a long time to get over someone. She said it made me kind of heartless and standoff-ish and that this makes me someone who is very hard to date… I feel like shit now. I kinda feel hopeless and lost, but part of me doesn’t care, while part of me just wants to be a normal girl that is datable.
I have no idea what to think anymore.
Okay I’m done now.
