I'm Danger. Stoney in Seattle. Anarchist with a heart too big to hold on to myself. Im obsessed with food. I have a passion for sarcasm and I'm great at ruining things. I'm just a 21 year old young lady trying to figure out how to be a woman. I love most of everything, but some shit I can't stand. I adore music. I listen to just about everything. I tend to complain about shit nobody cares about. Police Crawlin' On My Nuts
So, I have been having the usual “boy troubles” that comes with 20 year old bitches like me. Sad thing is, I’m having this realization that I may actually be doing this bullshit to myself. I have this thing for “bad asses” and can’t help but find their inability to give a fuck attractive. Oddly enough, I half way expect said “bad ass” guys to somehow magically care about me. I know they won’t, because it’s not in the nature. Does it stop me from caring about them? No. Should it? Probably. I upset myself when these fools front and act like they care and are sweet and lovey-dovey… But then it all stops when you say you’re not ready to fuck them yet. I should expect that they are ultimately horny asswipes that are really cool, if you’re not falling for them. Sex might not be the only goal, but by golly it’s always included. In my short romantic history I’ve realized that even though he may say it isn’t important, the fact of the matter is that sex will always be a factor. Will I give in before I’m ready? No. Will I lose a lot of potential interests because of my resistance? Fuckin duh.
I don’t want to be that girl that waits for the “perfect guy”. I just want someone cool to chill, listen to randomly epic music, watch movies and nerd out with, cook for and smoke with. IM LOOKING FOR A BLAZE BUDDY WHO WILL MAKE ME LAUGH AND MAKE FUN OF EVERYTHING WITH ME. Is that really that fucking difficult? Seriously?
But whatever I’m just complaining again. Fuck this feeling, whatever it is.
Sometimes I hear girls trying I flirt with guys and I hear them tell the guy that he looks “tasty” or “delicious” or “yummy”…. Do they really find that compelling?
You don’t want him, you just want his dick.
When people like me are out here trying their hardest not to pour out their soul to the guy that catches their eye, you go around with your tits out and your legs wide open making it almost impossible for people like me to actually connect with someone. And the fact that I’m fearful of the results of my awkward conversations doesn’t help either.
Okay I’m done yelling at the pretty girls now.
When cute boys are productive and have thier shit together, but they are stoners *____* so wonderfully attractive!
I realized that I find it attractive when guys can smoke mass amounts of bud and still act cool.
Allow me of I may to rant about my insignificant and most likely uninteresting teenage (not so) love life.
So I’m pretty sure I’m head over heels for this guy who I will never in a million years have any shot with. He is honestly one of the coolest and most interesting people I have ever met. He is super smart, talented, athletic, forgiving, understanding, the while 9 yards. But, he only shows his true colors when we are alone.
I would (and have) go completely out of my way to do any number of things for him. My goal (for some stupid reason) is to assure his happiness and safety. I love seeing him smile and be comfortable more than anything. He makes me feel safe. He listens to me when I feel sad or just need someone to talk to. His presence is my escape from all the negative in my life. I sometimes feel that I’m most comfortable when he is. I can’t seem to get him out of my head.
I know that I can’t have him. He doesn’t want me. I’m just a friend who happens to be down for crazy adventures or simple conversations. I’m just another “homie” he can call on whenever he feels he should or wants to. I wake up every morning knowing this is what my reality consists of, and it makes me sad.
He doesn’t dig girls like me. He likes them cute quiet and thin- I’m odd looking, loud and thick. He likes stereo typical pretty girls, and I’m wild and unpredictable and nowhere near pretty. He wants a treasure trove of normal and I’m a box of weird.
I know we can never be, but somehow I want him to know how I feel. I want him to know that I would go to the ends of the earth to make it work, but i know I will never get the opportunity or have the balls to tell him.
I honestly want to learn something from him. I hate the shrugs, vague answers and weak responses.
woo me with words and tell me something about the ways of the world from your eyes. Make me think. Make my perspective change,my tummy fill with butterflies and my skin crawl with your ability to turn a phrase.
I don’t care if every other girl denies it! INTELLIGENCE IN A MAN IS SEXY!
I keep having dreams where i meet this cute ass guy with dreads. some nights i have long luscious flowing hair with one sick ass dread in the back. i must have this. it has been decided.
i wanna be loved. Really loved for who i am, and whats in my head not just on it. i sometimes feel like nobody will ever be willing to give me the time of day because im weird. i like things that “normal” girls dont like, i refuse to hold my tongue, i say and do what i want and i think that guys just dont like that.
im really not willing to change my opinions or mannerisms to find someone. i want to be attracted to somebody who can keep up with me in an intellectual conversation, who can teach me things i would have never known, who will get me to try things i have never even thought to trying in my life.
i want to be told that i am important and that i matter. i want to be somebodys reason for waking up. i want “good mornings” and “good nights”, “you’re cutes” and “babes”. i want to be able to sit and do nothing but enjoy someones company, and have them be just as satisfied doing the same.I want to know what its like to be kissed, just because somebody cares enough about you to appreciate your presence physically.
to have lived 18 years and never having a kiss, makes me feel like im missing a world of wonder that i cannot discover on my own.
giant sigh, and a trickle of tears.
I find greasers and Rockabilly inspired guys super attractive.
either one xD